My Sunday School teacher spend one service explaining why we should never get a credit card. He taught us to live within our means.
(The rest of the time, I was being asked to believe a outrageous tale or another)What was the best advice you got in church?
Why worry about what other imperfect people think about you?
It's probably the only good advice I've ever gotten from going to a church.What was the best advice you got in church?
Don't take money out of the offering plate.
Don't chew the gum you find under the bench.
Don't wipe boogers on the hand rests.
Never let wet or loud farts during the sermon.
No laughing allowed.
Crying is encouraged.
Shake hands after using the bathroom.
Don't color or write in the books provided.
Absolutely nothing....unless bad advice counts? I have plenty of bad advice from churches!
Don't make change in the plate as it passes .... it has served me well.
Ath
To put my faith and trust in Jesus.
Tuesday, November 22, 2011
Can I get some advice on how to live with my adult daughter?
My 23 year old daughter lives with me. She has been though a rough time dealing with drugs. She is better now, (at least I think she is). She has a 3 year old daughter that lives with me too. Her boyfriend, also the father of her child, is still on drugs and I have banned him from my home. (he has stolen from me, hasn't gotten a job, doesn't support his baby. etc). Anyway,my daughter would like to continue to live with me while she goes back to school and gets a degree. I need advice on how to handle the situation. I am afraid I will fall back into treating her like a teenager. Can I get some advice on how to be a mom, but not get taken advantage of? Here is an example of what I mean:
She doesn't see any problem with staying out with her boyfriend until 1:00 am and then sleeping until 10:00 to 12:00. Which would not be a problem except her baby doesn't sleep that late. I feel this is neglectful. She says she gets up with her when I am not home but I don't really believe this.
She won't apply for ADC or Child Support because her boyfriend doesn't want it taken out of his check. However he won't pay for anything towards support of his baby. I have to buy her diapers, clothes etc. (I don't supply my daughter with cigarettes or phone minutes but I can't let the baby go without diapers).
She is very lazy, she won't clean or cook a meal. She will wear the same clothes for a week at a time because she doesn't want to wash her own clothes.
I am not sure how to handle this situation. I want to help but I don't want to let her take advantage of me. Any advise?Can I get some advice on how to live with my adult daughter?
First, never give her any money. What ever she needs, you buy it personally. You can't trust her, and you obviously can't trust the boyfriend.
Second, make her file for child support or you will cut her off. You won't cut the baby off, but her, yes. He needs to take responsibility. Force the hand.
It's smart, you keep all valuables locked up. I would too.
Make her help around too. I know you said she is lazy, but make her. It's your house. Good luck.Can I get some advice on how to live with my adult daughter?
not to be judgemental but it does not sound like your daughter is off drugs. Non drug users would never wear the same clothes a week at a time. She needs to learn to take care of herself and that baby. If you don't mind her living with her than set ground rules. She WILL get afdc or a part time job to help with the support of her child. she will not stay out late because she has a child to take care of. Explain to her that if she were to get her own place she could not do that and the benifit of living with you is no rent (i assume) so all you ask is that she take care of herself and her child. You will help out but you will not do it for her.
She already is taking advantage of you. My advise is to sit her down and give her a dose of reality. If she wants to go out, she is to bring in a sitter to watch her daughter and she is to pay for it. You might have banned her bf from the house, but if she is still seeing him, she is still around drugs, and chances are she is doing them. A drug user has to be taken totally away from drugs and anyone involved with them. I would seek legal advice and get custody of the granddaughter and kick her out. Do you honestly think she has straightened out? Read what you have written. You are fooling yourself.
You need to step in more than you have for your own sanity. She is already taking advantage of you.
Your daughter is shortchanging herself, you and the kid by NOT filing for child support. Never mind that the BF doesn't want it garnished from his check... he will just spend it on drugs anyway. Filing for ADC will help her through getting some career training. She can save what she doesn't really need to spend... or you could save it for her by means of taking some off the top and tucking it away in a special savings account.
I understand what you are going through... you want to provide your daughter with a fresh chance at life. Banning the BF from the house isn't working if she is still visiting with him to do some drugs or possibly get knocked up again.
You need to spell things out for your daughter... if she wants to live in your house, she will have to hold up at least her end of things. You need to lay down some clear boundaries. Quit doing things for her. She is not a kid any more. She cannot be allowed to dump everything on you. She has to do her own laundry, clean up after herself, handle her own kid, and pay her own bills. If she won't hold up her end, or obey your rules... the door is that way. If you think this will endanger the baby, then you can file for custody.
Given your history with her, you really should have a deadbolt lock on both your bedroom door and your closet door and anything portable of any value should be stashed within. This helped my parents a lot while enduring my brother's druggie phase.
She doesn't see any problem with staying out with her boyfriend until 1:00 am and then sleeping until 10:00 to 12:00. Which would not be a problem except her baby doesn't sleep that late. I feel this is neglectful. She says she gets up with her when I am not home but I don't really believe this.
She won't apply for ADC or Child Support because her boyfriend doesn't want it taken out of his check. However he won't pay for anything towards support of his baby. I have to buy her diapers, clothes etc. (I don't supply my daughter with cigarettes or phone minutes but I can't let the baby go without diapers).
She is very lazy, she won't clean or cook a meal. She will wear the same clothes for a week at a time because she doesn't want to wash her own clothes.
I am not sure how to handle this situation. I want to help but I don't want to let her take advantage of me. Any advise?Can I get some advice on how to live with my adult daughter?
First, never give her any money. What ever she needs, you buy it personally. You can't trust her, and you obviously can't trust the boyfriend.
Second, make her file for child support or you will cut her off. You won't cut the baby off, but her, yes. He needs to take responsibility. Force the hand.
It's smart, you keep all valuables locked up. I would too.
Make her help around too. I know you said she is lazy, but make her. It's your house. Good luck.Can I get some advice on how to live with my adult daughter?
not to be judgemental but it does not sound like your daughter is off drugs. Non drug users would never wear the same clothes a week at a time. She needs to learn to take care of herself and that baby. If you don't mind her living with her than set ground rules. She WILL get afdc or a part time job to help with the support of her child. she will not stay out late because she has a child to take care of. Explain to her that if she were to get her own place she could not do that and the benifit of living with you is no rent (i assume) so all you ask is that she take care of herself and her child. You will help out but you will not do it for her.
She already is taking advantage of you. My advise is to sit her down and give her a dose of reality. If she wants to go out, she is to bring in a sitter to watch her daughter and she is to pay for it. You might have banned her bf from the house, but if she is still seeing him, she is still around drugs, and chances are she is doing them. A drug user has to be taken totally away from drugs and anyone involved with them. I would seek legal advice and get custody of the granddaughter and kick her out. Do you honestly think she has straightened out? Read what you have written. You are fooling yourself.
You need to step in more than you have for your own sanity. She is already taking advantage of you.
Your daughter is shortchanging herself, you and the kid by NOT filing for child support. Never mind that the BF doesn't want it garnished from his check... he will just spend it on drugs anyway. Filing for ADC will help her through getting some career training. She can save what she doesn't really need to spend... or you could save it for her by means of taking some off the top and tucking it away in a special savings account.
I understand what you are going through... you want to provide your daughter with a fresh chance at life. Banning the BF from the house isn't working if she is still visiting with him to do some drugs or possibly get knocked up again.
You need to spell things out for your daughter... if she wants to live in your house, she will have to hold up at least her end of things. You need to lay down some clear boundaries. Quit doing things for her. She is not a kid any more. She cannot be allowed to dump everything on you. She has to do her own laundry, clean up after herself, handle her own kid, and pay her own bills. If she won't hold up her end, or obey your rules... the door is that way. If you think this will endanger the baby, then you can file for custody.
Given your history with her, you really should have a deadbolt lock on both your bedroom door and your closet door and anything portable of any value should be stashed within. This helped my parents a lot while enduring my brother's druggie phase.
Can i get some advice on the first verse of this?
I鈥檓 lying on the pavement
Staring down the barrel of some fool鈥檚 nine
This is my only way to escape enslavement
From my life, this constant grind
I know this could be the end of my life
I reach deep into my pocket for my knife
Because I鈥檓 not afraid to roll deep
I鈥檝e done it many times before
Still I find myself about to weep
I don鈥檛 want to die face down on this gravel floor
Cause I don鈥檛 want to die some ***** lying on the street
I鈥檓 never gonna let myself except defeat
So I lunge out, pain shooting up my thigh
I can feel as my steel slides into his flesh
I feel myself start to cry
Tears added into the mesh
A mixture of fears
Now a mixture of tears
A mixture of hate
Now a mixture of slanted fate
That鈥檚 turned upon me
A toll that鈥檚 once again has taken its fee
Can i get some advice on the first verse of this?
It's very good. I'm just not sure which lines,as some type of order, are to rhyme. Rhyming words are great, the flow seems uneven. It starts with 1/3; 5/6; 7/9; 11/12; 14/16; if I counted correctly, then each two lines. Maybe it is a method I am not familiar with.
Staring down the barrel of some fool鈥檚 nine
This is my only way to escape enslavement
From my life, this constant grind
I know this could be the end of my life
I reach deep into my pocket for my knife
Because I鈥檓 not afraid to roll deep
I鈥檝e done it many times before
Still I find myself about to weep
I don鈥檛 want to die face down on this gravel floor
Cause I don鈥檛 want to die some ***** lying on the street
I鈥檓 never gonna let myself except defeat
So I lunge out, pain shooting up my thigh
I can feel as my steel slides into his flesh
I feel myself start to cry
Tears added into the mesh
A mixture of fears
Now a mixture of tears
A mixture of hate
Now a mixture of slanted fate
That鈥檚 turned upon me
A toll that鈥檚 once again has taken its fee
Can i get some advice on the first verse of this?
It's very good. I'm just not sure which lines,as some type of order, are to rhyme. Rhyming words are great, the flow seems uneven. It starts with 1/3; 5/6; 7/9; 11/12; 14/16; if I counted correctly, then each two lines. Maybe it is a method I am not familiar with.
Can i get some advice on a girl i like?
now i have been talking to this girl for like 4 months were are not together we are just friends that have strong feelings for each other.....i told her that i really like her and she told me that she's thankful god has put me in her life....now she has two young kids i have both meet and they like me as much as she does..so does her brother and sisters....we haven't sex yet, im not worried about that cuz i care about her so much, but i have been kissing her all the time even kissed her in front of kids. now lately we have been going from kissing to hugs and kisses on the cheeks that's even coo with me...but last week we have been going back into kissing now, but again lately she just wants a hug that has me really confused but i know everyone she has every loved has did her wrong in the past, including her baby daddy....now last week i told her i would never hurt her and all i want is for her to be happy, but it seems to me that she still playing back a little.....I have also help buy her kids stuff when she dont have..so my first question is what can i do to seal the deal with herCan i get some advice on a girl i like?
apply this article using the most passionate and sexual kiss you can. Then try to move to more sexual feeling and see how it goes. Your best bet is to just be confident and forward here.
http://winnersdontthink.com/?p=53Can i get some advice on a girl i like?
Hi darling, don't bother with this girl, come and chat to me at http://berebitg.riseth.org it's free to sign up, and you will be able to cop a great deal more of me in my photographs - if you understand my meaning :-). Simply search for curvygirl, I will be there for you!
apply this article using the most passionate and sexual kiss you can. Then try to move to more sexual feeling and see how it goes. Your best bet is to just be confident and forward here.
http://winnersdontthink.com/?p=53Can i get some advice on a girl i like?
Hi darling, don't bother with this girl, come and chat to me at http://berebitg.riseth.org it's free to sign up, and you will be able to cop a great deal more of me in my photographs - if you understand my meaning :-). Simply search for curvygirl, I will be there for you!
Monday, August 23, 2010
Can i get some advice on my homies rhyme?
Got my red hat, yea got my red hat, just like my six four it switch from front to back,... I got my red hat, tweak it to back while im ridin shotgun in the 'lac that my homie just jacked, when my cap is to tha side all tha honeys call me fly - they like the way it shines with the emblem that represents NY, my hat be so fine, anyone say otherwise - ill hit you with my nine - it should be a crime to mess with a starter like mine- if i was a judge itd be 25 ta lifeCan i get some advice on my homies rhyme?
Ummm. the lyrics need some work. Maybe if it has a good beat it might sound good.
Ummm. the lyrics need some work. Maybe if it has a good beat it might sound good.
Can i get some advice?
i knew for a long time that i wanted to leave my husband. i told him in july of 2007, and we went back and forth until recenty. he found a job in another city, found an apartment, and now he is in the process of moving out. he hadnt worked since 2001. that was the main reason why i said he had to leave, but he just landed this job 3 months ago, and seems to be on the right track, it just hurts me to high hell knowing that it was me kicking him out that got him jump started. its not that i regret my decision, but seeing his empty closet, and his things moved out hurts. is there any advice out there for getting over the hurt? o dealing with it in a healthy manor?Can i get some advice?
I have to say until you wrote the additional comments I wasn't sure what to say other than give it some time. Time will help but it doesn't do much for how you feel unless you decide to change. Just because he's employed and has a place of his own doesn't mean he's back on his feet. It just means he's doesn't have anyone at the moment to enable his behaviors. Before I was married, I was in a long term relationship very similar to yours. I was terrified to be alone and felt if I just believed and was the best person I could be that someone how he would respect that and respect me. His behaviors were neither respectful nor responsible. It took a very long time for me to finally walk away as well but I have to say it was the best decision I've ever made. Allow yourself to feel the loss and grieve over your relationship. Seek out a group of people in similar situations or a counselor to talk about how this is affecting you. Rely on your friends but not too heavily or it can become overbearing for them to deal with. Know that you are doing the best for yourself and you are worth having someone who will respect and treat you with dignity. Don't allow your grief to keep you from exploring life and do things you enjoy doing without considering him. It will get easier as time goes on and if you don't obsess over him and find ways to enrich your own life. Be strong! Can i get some advice?
I think you should move. Do what he's doing, leave that past behind you, I think that's the healthy thing to do.
And as far as your emotions go, I recently asked a similar question and this was the answer that made sense to me ';you made the right choice....life isn't easy, but id rather struggle knowing i care about someone an its tough to move on , than to live w/ hate an anger toward another person';
It's not easy but maybe you should just start doing more for yourself making yourself happy, if you have friends or family members that may invite you out you should go and enjoy. Its a huge change when the person you were living with so long is no longer there that is understandable but at the same time you have to look at the reason you didn't want to live with him anymore. I hope you feel better soon, good luck.
So... why does it hurt knowing both of you are in a better situation?
You are now free of having to deal with a lazy man and he now has a job and has gotten back on track for him.
You need a new man, it sounds like yes. But don't get one that takes advantages or things for granted from his spouse.
Marrige....
For Better for Worst..... Rich or POOR! your loss sweetie. you didnt take your vows they way they where meant... now its time for you to move on, ,you didnt support him, when he mostly needed him, have a good one and learn from your mistake....
That's good that you do not regret your decision. Whenever someone we love or are close to moves, etc., it hurts. The routine is broken. Fill up your free time will things that give you pleasure. Good luk to you.
Time can and wil heal everything. when i left my ex it hurt sooo bad. but he was a bum too. make sure you have a good support system and you ll be fine. good luckcolor cosmetics
I have to say until you wrote the additional comments I wasn't sure what to say other than give it some time. Time will help but it doesn't do much for how you feel unless you decide to change. Just because he's employed and has a place of his own doesn't mean he's back on his feet. It just means he's doesn't have anyone at the moment to enable his behaviors. Before I was married, I was in a long term relationship very similar to yours. I was terrified to be alone and felt if I just believed and was the best person I could be that someone how he would respect that and respect me. His behaviors were neither respectful nor responsible. It took a very long time for me to finally walk away as well but I have to say it was the best decision I've ever made. Allow yourself to feel the loss and grieve over your relationship. Seek out a group of people in similar situations or a counselor to talk about how this is affecting you. Rely on your friends but not too heavily or it can become overbearing for them to deal with. Know that you are doing the best for yourself and you are worth having someone who will respect and treat you with dignity. Don't allow your grief to keep you from exploring life and do things you enjoy doing without considering him. It will get easier as time goes on and if you don't obsess over him and find ways to enrich your own life. Be strong! Can i get some advice?
I think you should move. Do what he's doing, leave that past behind you, I think that's the healthy thing to do.
And as far as your emotions go, I recently asked a similar question and this was the answer that made sense to me ';you made the right choice....life isn't easy, but id rather struggle knowing i care about someone an its tough to move on , than to live w/ hate an anger toward another person';
It's not easy but maybe you should just start doing more for yourself making yourself happy, if you have friends or family members that may invite you out you should go and enjoy. Its a huge change when the person you were living with so long is no longer there that is understandable but at the same time you have to look at the reason you didn't want to live with him anymore. I hope you feel better soon, good luck.
So... why does it hurt knowing both of you are in a better situation?
You are now free of having to deal with a lazy man and he now has a job and has gotten back on track for him.
You need a new man, it sounds like yes. But don't get one that takes advantages or things for granted from his spouse.
Marrige....
For Better for Worst..... Rich or POOR! your loss sweetie. you didnt take your vows they way they where meant... now its time for you to move on, ,you didnt support him, when he mostly needed him, have a good one and learn from your mistake....
That's good that you do not regret your decision. Whenever someone we love or are close to moves, etc., it hurts. The routine is broken. Fill up your free time will things that give you pleasure. Good luk to you.
Time can and wil heal everything. when i left my ex it hurt sooo bad. but he was a bum too. make sure you have a good support system and you ll be fine. good luck
Can i get some advice on a girl i like?
now i have been talking to this girl for like 4 months were are not together we are just friends that have strong feelings for each other.....i told her that i really like her and she told me that she's thankful god has put me in her life....now she has two young kids i have both meet and they like me as much as she does..so does her brother and sisters....we haven't sex yet, im not worried about that cuz i care about her so much, but i have been kissing her all the time even kissed her in front of kids. now lately we have been going from kissing to hugs and kisses on the cheeks that's even coo with me...but last week we have been going back into kissing now, but again lately she just wants a hug that has me really confused but i know everyone she has every loved has did her wrong in the past, including her baby daddy....now last week i told her i would never hurt her and all i want is for her to be happy, but it seems to me that she still playing back a little.....I have also help buy her kids stuff when she dont have..so my first question is what can i do to seal the deal with herCan i get some advice on a girl i like?
apply this article using the most passionate and sexual kiss you can. Then try to move to more sexual feeling and see how it goes. Your best bet is to just be confident and forward here.
http://winnersdontthink.com/?p=53Can i get some advice on a girl i like?
Hi darling, don't bother with this girl, come and chat to me at http://berebitg.riseth.org it's free to sign up, and you will be able to cop a great deal more of me in my photographs - if you understand my meaning :-). Simply search for curvygirl, I will be there for you!
apply this article using the most passionate and sexual kiss you can. Then try to move to more sexual feeling and see how it goes. Your best bet is to just be confident and forward here.
http://winnersdontthink.com/?p=53Can i get some advice on a girl i like?
Hi darling, don't bother with this girl, come and chat to me at http://berebitg.riseth.org it's free to sign up, and you will be able to cop a great deal more of me in my photographs - if you understand my meaning :-). Simply search for curvygirl, I will be there for you!
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